Tests and more....

It seems fitting that during exams that I should put myself through a barrage of tests not concerned with the exams at all. It is in my honest and humble opinion strangely justified that I should do something to hone that certain set of skills that will enable me to shine at my upcoming academic exams.

*obviously, as most of you might know, my exams are now finished, but like I've said before, why waste a blog post already in the works.

well please put up with me.. and god bless to u too.


Who's your Disney Alter-Ego Test

You scored as The Beast.
Your alter ego is The Beast! But that is only a name... you are kind hearted and sweet, people just misunderstand you.

The Beast- 100%
Donald Duck- 69%
Cinderella- 69%
Goofy- 56%
Ariel- 56%
Sleeping Beauty- 56%
Cruella De Ville- 44%
Peter Pan- 44%
Snow White- 44%
Pinocchio- 44%

Excuse me but The Beast? Enough said. I always thought I was Peter Pan, please politely muffle the disbelief ok!! And Cinderella comes up on the list how? However I should be glad that I am not Snow White. Chi.

Which religion is the right one for you?

You scored as agnosticism.
You are an agnostic. Though it is generally taken that agnostics neither believe nor disbelieve in God, it is possible to be a theist or atheist in addition to an agnostic. Agnostics don't believe it is possible to prove the existence of God (nor lack thereof). Agnosticism is a philosophy that God's existence cannot be proven. Some say it is possible to be agnostic and follow a religion; however, one cannot be a devout believer if he or she does not truly believe.

agnosticism- 88%
Buddhism- 79%
Satanism- 75%
Islam- 75%
atheism- 50%
Paganism- 50%
Hinduism- 46%
Judaism- 42%
Christianity- 29%

Ok so I think this is VERY accurate. Although, I do sincerely believe in God's existence. I believe that he created us. I believe also that religion is man's creation and therefore, inevitably, corrupt, flawed and biased. In additon, I would like to say that religion in itself is not a bad thing as it allows you to articulate your faiths in some manner that is familiar to you. Take for instance the fact that my prayers are irrevocably Hindu in nature, even though I don't believe in the existence of specific deities. One higher power. That's all. Satanism? Rigggghtt.

What's your High-School Stereotype?

You are a Loner.

Loner- 75%
Goth- 63%
Ghetto gangsta- 63%
Geek- 63%
Prep/Jock/Cheerleader- 56%
Punk/Rebel- 56%
Drama nerd- 44%
Stoner- 25%

OMG. What a load of cock!! Anyways, I personally think I am a loner SOMETIMES. However, more often than not, I am like a (social) butterfly in a field full of daffodils (although in my fantasy, it's a field of strawberries). Ahh well, the reliability and validity of these tests are very much in question here since they classify me as being equally Goth(which I am not), Ghetto Gangsta (which is hilarious) and a Geek (which yes, I think I agree with that). Hmm, but just to be a bit more objective in critiquing these tests, by classifying that I am equally popular and geekish.. I would say that it is pretty damn accurate for what I mostly feel about myself. Very confused and therefore angst-ridden in the rush to attach a label to myself (and everyone else).

Right I am done with tests. Damn you Kundi and Sherene. ooo so much fun lah.

Anyways, YES, i am done with TESTS!!!!! yay! exams were a bitch this time. I don't think I did too shabbily but the feelings of preparation and sense of confidence that usually precedes these fateful days was definitely absent this time around. I've been a bit distracted. Extremely nice distraction though. It takes a LOT to take me from my books at the end of semester and believe you me when I say LOT. So what am I really trying to say here? SEXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!! no but seriously, its helluva fun and nice to talk to someone without the requisite expectations.. so therefore, it seems, that personality plays a big factor this time around.. and i like.. i like... God someone's getting a massive ego boost here... Anyway, the last exam was awesome. the two preceding it were not that great, but like I said, how bad could I have screwed up especially when I feel that I did not (screw up)? I think I might be jinxing myself here so I am gonna shut up about exams now.

What Am I Doing Now: Typing Blog, Listening to Lose my Breath by Destiny's Child, in this white tshirt with BITCH printed on it. Nice.

Feeling: Blissful, Relaxed and Content

Yes. So yesterday, in lieu of finishing exams and Sujan's birthday, a few of us went to Coyote Ugly and Tiki Bar. The crowd consisted of Sujan, Chamila-boy, Pavithra-boy, Nadeeka, Shiny and Myself. We started off the night at the sultan, with a bottle of Jim Beam and a half-bottle of Johnny. Nadeeka says I was being atrociously happy. She's just jealous that I'm done with exams and she is NOT. muhuhahaha. Well, I had a brilliant time!! Anyway, being whacked as we were, the concept of having more alcohol was enthusiastically agreed to and we preceded too Tiki Bar minus Nadeeka (common sense prevailed). So liquid buffet was on and the music was good. I don't remember a single song from there, but I do remember dancing like mad and also peeing a lot.. Anyways, Shiny and I decide to vist one of Singapore's more subversive clubs so we sneak out and jump into a cab. Two minutes later, we realize we don't have any cash on us. So we tell uncle-uncle to stop the cab next to an ATM machine and withdraw money very fast, or as fast as two drunkards can sensibly press the correct buttons. Get back into the cab and again, realize that it is really is very rude we didn't tell anyone that we left. So we about turn and come back to Tiki Bar. Utterly useless trip, waste of money. BUT SO MUCH FUN. I am a big fan of the fun as you might have realized.

Anyways, we trudge out of Tiki Bar, reluctantly and collectively hanging our heads and admitting to ourselves we might have drunk one (twenty) too many. Go for supper behind Boat Quay. Don't remember what I ate but Do remember two chicks sitting next to our table. One pretty one and one fat one (fat doesn't mean ugly ok, but in this case, fat was quite ugly). So i start talking to the fat one and Sujan leers at the pretty one. Hee Hee. Sujan is one funny guy. a little excerpt from our conversation/s:

Fat: Oh my god, you are so drunk. You Indian men really cannot handle your liquor.

Me: Atleast I'm not Fat.

(actually I AM a bit on the heavy side, but you should have seen HER).

Pretty: I am Ceylonese*

Sujan: So? What is your surname?

Pretty: Ganesh

Sujan: Oh so your Tamil?

Pretty: Erm, I think so. Tamils are cool aren't they?

Er. right. Pretty was kinda bimbotic. I prefer fat coz after our scintillating start, we really dished out the insults and it turned out to be quite fun and very adult-ish. Ha!

After supper for no particular reason told everyone to take cabs and I would go last.

Problem: Everyone is gone and no cab in sight.

I think i contemplated sleeping on the pavement for the night but luckily a cab came along. the next memory I have is waking in my bed at 2pm in my boxers only and contacts still in my eyes. woke up then, chilled around. sweated alcohol. drank a lot of water. generally nursed the mother of all hangovers with liberal doses of desperate housewives which i watched with nadeeka who very generously bought over lunch!

So slept after that. Met Shashin and Nadeeka and went out for dinner around 9 30. NYDC, Holland Village. Ate the chicken salad!!! it was fucking good. and not so salady and healthy which was a big relief. Had Mango sorbet at Haägen Dazs and came back home. Met Adam there, apparently on his one year anniversary dinner.

Yay. Successful day. Also took great pleasure in throwing out the papers collected over this semester. Readings, Books, Notes--> i wish i could piss on them. tsk tsk.

Awright then, this has been an extremely long post for me. So I should just go. Have Sin City and Hannibal on my computer wating to be watched. I love verbosity.

also, watched the interpreter. It's an intelligent, articulate, if somewhat anti-climatic thriller with beyooootiful Nicole Kidman and brilliant Sean Penn in the lead. I loved the film. I thought it was a different take on the thriller genre. a more realistic movie devoid of cheap thrills. A- for sure. Movies that have got A+ have been movies like Kill Bill, the Hours, Far From Heaven, eternal sunshine.., the green mile, Closer, Hotel Rwanda. A- is reserved for movies like Titanic, Lola Rentt, The Aviator, the Terminal etc.

ok bye

whole lotta love

time: 7 40am

implication of time: screwed for exam

because: not been doing anything worthwhile since sexy times

i feel more mature. i can control my destiny. i can be a honest person and not be ashamed about what i think and feel. i can accept the facts of life. i can be happy. i can be sad. i'd rather be happy. it is entirely up to me. i can be a hypocrite and be ashamed about what i think and feel. i can love. i can't hate. i can hurt. it is entirely up to me. i can over-justify. i can over-analyze. i can just live in the moment. i can die in the moment.

but right now i enjoy the moment.

brushing off the dust. admiring. loving. ebb/flow. preparation. anticipation.

mutations of oneself from aeons (months) ago. evolution. natural selection. deepseated change in the psyche. desensitized, but not insensitive. but not indifferent. happy for a constant in whichever form (mutation).

i'm lovin' it

great mystery of life

I've just got back from my first final exam of the semester. I feel drained. I feel needy. I feel hopeful of things to come. I feel the need to shout at the top of my compromised lungs about life in general. Life in general is good. I can't complain about it. Although I do, and I will, soon, maybe in the next 5 minutes.

I also feel hysterically sleepy. I can hear my brain screaming at me to hit the fucking sack already. My eyelids feel as if they're gonna fall off. Normal blinks of the eye become strained episodes of pulling them off my very ordinary eyelashes.

I also feel the need to apologize for my previous post. I thought it was an enlightened piece of blog-tastic material. I do not regret making the post. I am just apologizing just because it must be done. I have an obligation to those who read my blog and therefore to maintain readership I must apologize, however insincerely, about the entire repotoire of negative feelings directly caused by it. Yeah i'm just typing stuff for the sake of typing stuff out.. i like blogging.. i feel nice when a new post is up..

life's so scary. and exciting. but sleep. sweet oblivion

song playing at the moment: ain't no sunshine- mary j.blige & aretha franklin

chatting to: perpetually-distressed milhana

scratching: legs

due to: mosquitos

now listening to: streetsweepers- akon

staring at: mattress cover to see if it needs laundering

decision: no, its quite clean.. dayem!

mood: joblessness.... where did THAT come from?

ciao

toilet slave

for those who wanted an intelligent post from me, get out now while you can, coz the next few words will not only shock you, repulse you and generally upset you, it will also make you keep reading every revolting word until you've come to the end of this post and then you shall realize how pointless and irrelevant this post actually was.... (i shall quit the self-deprecation nonsense, actually personal-blog-deprecation NOW).

ah yes, so as i was saying (is it just me or is there a stupid lag in the create post section, as in, the typed words take about a millisecond too long to appear on screen, creating the illusion that maybe you've had too much of coffee/acid/weed.... wishful thinking much?)

ahh well, yes.. toilet slave. A toilet slave, is, yes, you've guessed correct, a person who is enslaved to using the toilet... actually your wrong.

it actually means, that if a person is a toilet slave, he/she gets sexual pleasure out of peeing/defaecating (i really don't want to be a prude, but i'm taking a pseudo Victorian lady stance here) in his/her partner's mouth. By implication, this also means that the partner enjoys it too considering that he/she consented to it... i mean there are certain things we don't like but still do to please our significant others but come on, there is a limit right? so therefore i would assume that putting weird ass shit into your mouth (excuse the lame ass but appropriate pun, oo look i punned again) would only be consented to if it actually bought sexual pleasure in turn too.. maybe the person who eats the shit in the first place is the one who gets sexual pleasure, i.e. he/she thou ingests is toilet slave?

so..

spit or swallow ----> chew, eat or spit?

right.. so actually, our first definition is not all that wrong.. its just that we need to change our perspectives of what a toilet is, i.e. in this case, a human mouth. hmmm bad taste in your mouth yet? (ooo pun)

but, to be truthful, i've felt like a toilet slave the past few days...

y'all can pick up those jaws from those clean singaporean floors now...

its just that, i've drunk a few too many coffees the past few days and that has consequently turned my stomach into an unyielding biatch.. so therefore all i can do.. is fervently hope for a decent bowel movement... ALL THE FRICKING TIME... like.. the choice of location for studying depends on where the nearest/cleanest toilet is... u know in case nature calls.. my momma always told me to be prepared... so im kinda a toilet slave.. but strictly in a traditional sense.. so ppl... don't get scared ok..

Victorian lady stance my ass..

ok got to run... will blog later on interesting(mundane) and not-so-repulsive stuff... but hey.. it is life..must discuss.. however distasteful..

everyone these days has a comment at the end (or beginning) informing us about which song they've got playing on their comps.. so im gonna do it myself...

Song/s of the moment

David Gray- This Year's Love
Rufus Wainwright- The Art Teacher
George Michael & Aretha Franklin- I knew you were waiting
Damien Rice- Cold Water

Playing Now: Bin Tere Sanam

Chatting to: Soon-to-be-off-to-motherland-Pavs

Pining for: *blush

Ok now, i'm off... bless y'all.. i promise you i shall get a template for these random stats... and make myself a casuality of the same-boat-train... been there done that..

grey matter

standing on the line (of beauty): areas between the dichotomy of what is and what should be and wishing that they merge in splendid fashion... ahhh... if only... i sigh wistfully as i stare at my.. erm.. computer screen in a very unromantic way.. a.k.a very stupid, pseudo intelligent way.. ha ha.. yay.. boo

so.. yep.. i have nothing to worry about... i shouldn't over analyze... exams are inconsequential.. but u know.. they really aren't.. it matters like hell to me that i should excel at academics.. hee hee. but i also believe in the notion of effective (if not magnificent) time management which rightfully balances the scales between studies and fun.. by this i don't mean, 50-50 (the biscuits remind me of sickly old uncles who grumble too much.. but i digress) time managment.. omg.. imagine 50% on studies.. nahin! mujhe bachao.. (whatever) but.. yeah.. i think there's a formula for the RIGHT sort of work/life ethic to acheive excellence at work and in life. note however, that work is NOT a subset of MY life.. ha ha ha. im so posh.. no, really, im not joking.. posh is i..

some people tell me that im taking ''incoherency on a platter'' too far, and i think, do they want them in small portions? like in an un-platter like way? like one pastry at a time? or, gourmet food like? or hmm.. not at all? well.. i say.. TOUGH.. deal with it..

lame joke or what?

my top 5 songs at the moment:

1. Tera Mera Pyar Sanam- Bombay Vikings (this is the song they played at my cousins wedding for their first dance as a married couple. it was fucking sweet coz it was so obvious that she was fully in love with her new husband and she mouthed the words to the song, which even though is not the right protocol in these type of situations (which calls for sophisticated, almost embarrassed, and absolutely NO hindi movie hip swaggers and lip synching) triggered a whole load of misty eyes in the audience full of cynical sindhis)

2. Nothing Really Matters- Madonna (the album, Ray of Light is a revelation to how talented this woman is EVEN though she was the one who wore a top that showed off her tits while singing a song with lyrics heavily borrowed from Hindu prayers. i could literally hear ppl going ''chi'' and ''hare ram'' and ''o hey lets jack off''

3. Hayling- FC Kahuna --> from the soundtrack of Nip/Tuck and very haunting and sophisticated

4. Over and Over- Nelly and Tim McGraw- surprisingly one of those nice and slow numbers from Nelly, the one and only who gave us Ride wit'me and Country Grammar, which btw has a decent title but starts with '' Hot Shit"...

5. Alone- Heart. Great 80's song. sung by Carrie Underwood at american idol 4... one of those landmark performances... great song..

yes yes.. im going now.. i should go.. leave the grey matters of the world behind.. the thin line between distractions..

omg did u know that ppl spell rock as rawks.. as in: this place rawks!!

and for fuck they say fwak.. as in: u fwaking rawk....

so cool

weekend

i wasn't really looking forward to this weekend. all due to the fact that exams are coming up and something really unnerving is coursing through my system. i have a bad, bad feeling about exams this semester. i think its because i didnt have any exams last semester. everything was done right before reading week and although i was exhausted for a few days after submitting my last assignment, i was glad not to go through the gruelling process of cramming that my peers were going through.

well this bad, bad feeling about exams escalated to very high levels this weekend... but for once, i didnt give a fuck.. (pun intended?) i was lolling, frolicking about in the comfort of multiple limbs (much like multi-limbed Hindu Gods.. blasphemous, and not a very original joke, i.e. borrowed) and i felt content... I know i've been extremely horny these past few weeks (i can hear my friends going, ONLY the past few weeks?), but honestly, this time the physical stuff was just a bonus, the icing to the cake of very rarely found good company... and the accessories were awesome too (i.e. the friends.. i.e. the best friend) how did coffee breaks become so much fun? ok so there was sleep.. very comfortable, secure sleep... and yet, there were intermittent breaks in slumber that were very welcome..... *content*

vague much?

anyways, here i am, in my own room, trying sooo hard to work, but i can't concentrate.... marshmellows spilling out of the packet i thought i could share with my friends who instead, opted for yummy potato chips dipped in salsa... hmph.. yeah but those chips were yummy... and i've got chicken teriyaki dinner waiting for me whenever i feel hungry enough to have it... there's something abt soggy jap food that makes me still choose that over other stuff they sell on this damn campus...

right then, im off to nap.. need to recharge.. but such a change from last night...

ooo flashbacks... :)

muffins

banana muffins straight from the oven (or microwave, ha ha) with a nice baked good banana-ish smell with maybe a tiny treat of partially-baked banana in the banana muffin. sigh. this is my craving now. and what do i have in my room (edible)?

i have.. 8 bottles of water (i know, i'm sorry), 2 packets of coffee (but no mug, as it is in the study room, which is where i have to be at the end of this blog), stale weetbix (maybe shall eat that if im too constipated), 3 packets of apple juice (also for constipatory reasons, though have to drink before it turns into alcohol, yucky, soury alcohol, so obviously not the good kind), assorted sweets, strepsils and staple pins and a packet of unopened oreos.

unopened oreos. shriek. reverberating shocks of revulsion that will be heard, when i make this confession to my dear friends. its much akin to not opening supersize packets of of evil Lays. like pimples, Lays and oreos have a life-like, menacing presence in our lives. much to my horror, my hand sneaks into the bag where the oreos are kept partially out of sight, but i snap it back: an imaginary mommy slap to prevent the robbery of fresh baked goods out of Singer ovens bought for ridiculously high prices just before discount sales in the following month. goddamit.

oh, back home, the original McDonalds is attached to the premier place for electronic consumer and other white goods. so once ur done with chewing ur juicy, standardized, tasteless McChicken's bathed in mayo or ketchup, u can stroll into Abans (as this place is called) and contemplate buying a washing machine, sewing machine, microwave, random glassware or even random Santa Clause's to enthrall your children with the spirit of Christmas. yes, im not getting to any point in this blog. yeah? deal with it ok! fuck off

but one day, on Holi. my enterprising cousins and i, soaked in the colors of a drug-infused, pupil dilated (paula), rainbow, stumble into McDonalds in Sri Lanka. people obviously stare fiercely. we intentionally, walk around the whole of mcdonalds trying to find an appropriate place to sit (even though, the place had many, many places for four people to sit). So through this impromptu, purposeful and very real fashion show we get asked, very cautiously, and might i add, very politically correctly, by a very efficient waiter(i think he was the manager, explaining his level of busybodiness and efficiency), why we are the we are? So one of my cousins, decides to throw some kind of a fit and screams, in a key right above a whisper, that its none of his business since we are buying food from the damn place and filling its coffers with a much needed 550 bucks. But madam, u might stain the seats. And she says, hee hee, u silly man, we'll just use ur bathroom dryers to help with that problem. ha ha ha. ended up eating food in bathroom and disrupting peace in McDonalds. however, i think of it as infusing a bit of ancient culture and indian-ness in a world dominated by a western presence. right. what a load of cock.

coffee makes me rub my feet vigorously against each other. also makes me very nervous. and makes me think that puking my thoughts out on a computer will make me a carrie bradshaw. wonder what a male version of carrie bradshaw will look like? me? larry king? al gore? dr.mahathir? vajpayee? trannies in geylang?

ahh well. oooo..yay.

shit

why why why why why do i think i'm unbearably clever and so self-sufficient? i know my services marketing lectures are beyond comprehension but i still have this (evidently false) sense of peace goading me into not doing anything to remotely understand it until.. erm.. like now...! and panic bombs are just having a field day in my stupidly complacent (not now of course) head... the pearls of knowledge go as far as my plasticky head [:p] and get stuck in congealed gel (residue squeezed out of bottle; scum of hair products world).

pavs i know im kinda copying you with respect to themes on blogs.. but i'm sure you understand right? tomorrow i have a presentation, immediately followed up by said quiz.. and then woopeee im done with services marketing.. well not quite.. the fucker hands out an assignment that must be completed within 48 hours... my class doenst have any sense... it was originally 24 hours... but.. noooo... they put additional pressures on me (and them too, im sure) to come up with profound explanations on how service providers allocate capacity to customers... as opposed to coming up with piecemeal explanations that are entirely acceptable due to the 24 hour constraint....considering everyone wants to EXCEL... actually no, people are just too lazy to work immediately...

oh btw, fyi, (hee hee), i am one of those people who pushed for a 48 hour deadline... well.. i know i'm a jackass.. but im repenting ain't i? god i have issues

anyways, my social life has taken a huge backward step. my smoking habit is constantly at bay... which is good.. until i let myself sample one lovely piece of heaven.. and then im furiously spraying my room with haute-couture cologne and i'm transported into complacency admist the intoxicating freshness... sigh..

haute couture is an inappropriate word. i just used it coz im overcome with a desire to go to new york and be like all new age man, with vodka martinis and surrounded by beautiful, ambitious and obsessive compulsive people.. f(sex and the city-season finale). following the same train of thought...

www.urbandictionary.com is the place for all your queries on the latest in slang and filth.. update your vocabulary.. classic webster or oxford dictionaries are sooo 1984.

a sample for my lovelies...

haute couture

French term refering to the extravagant and often absurd and impractically unrealistic fashion pieces that designers create to demonstrate their unique style and inventiveness.Proper pronunciation can be tricky; haute is somewhere between ought and oat, pronounced quickly so that the o is highly unrounded ("oh", if held long enough, ends up sounding like a /oo/). couture is pronounced ko'tur with a highly unrounded 'o', a 'u' that sounds almost like a german umlaut, and an 'r' made in a way similar to gargling.Alternatively, you could pronounce it in a very American fashion as 'ought kuh-ter'.

uber

The ultimate, above all, the best, top, something that nothing is better than. Also Über
I'm Über confused

Term with literal meaning of "above" in German. Brought to the mainstream in the early 80's by hardcore American punk band, the Dead Kennedys when using the term in the anti-Californian government song "California Uber Alles", which is a take off the German motto of "Deustchland Uber Alles", which translates to "Germany above all." The term was picked up in their native California stomping grounds by the typical surfers and "punks" and extended from there to many teenagers, the majority of which use the term online.
That was uber-lame.

doggie style

a sexual intercourse position that men learn from dogs. Especially helpful when the woman have a nice body but fucked up face, so that we don't have to see their face....
"That chick got a nice body but fucked up face, I will only do her in doggie style."

how every guy imagines what it would be like to have a wife/girlfriend who wouldnt mind sex when ever, where ever.
at a bar you bend her over the bar and fuck her up the ass or pussy

yes.. i take no responsibility for any of what is not mine that is above..

see what i mean, its the perfect place to waste hours on end figuring out nice, alternative perspectives on words that u are either unfamiliar with, or familiar but aching for more enlightenment..

i wish i was at a movie right now getting my guts all squirmy, also known as watching Samara. I feel exactly that way right now, but atleast Samara is not gonna manifest herself as a whole audience who will take great pleasure in pointing out why online consulting is such a good idea and why the fuck did we thrash the idea when its so obvious its right the opposite?

ok then... do i feel any better now...? blogs are great... yay..but sorry... it hasn't helped me one bit.. u know the whole perception of how getting things out on paper is therapeutic bullshit... ? well yeah.. im a self-aware, overly self-sufficient person very much in love with knowing exactly how badly im gonna do badly on a test/mess up words during formalized verbal talk.. and therefore all this blog has done for me can be divided into 2 broad categories:

1. updated my blog
2. given me a record of how fucked up (and how correct) i was before the fateful day which is 20 minutes away... hark the spirits of delusion and bad educational habits...

right.. this drama mama is signing off..

enna di?

continuity

yo! several things have happened...! yay

well for one, i handed in my essay on Sukarno and Ho Chi Minh. An absolutely shit essay it was. Well i'm not really sure if its a shit essay, i hope not, but i have a sneaking suspicion it was.. just that internal critic going ballastic.. fuck it... I really did want to make the effort to correct it, but you see, I had just finished an essay for my South Asian module, based on the Sri-Lankan political system and its role in fucking things up big time with regard to a war, that has been raging since about the time i was concieved.. *disturbing thoughts about inappropriate acts with riots going on outside*, and THEREFORE, could i be bothered to invest another chunk of time to another essay? Obviously not..

but, that essay was really good, if i do say so myself. However, i was up doing it for almost like..er.. a day and a half? and that really screwed up my back muscles so over the last couple of days, i've been moving slowly and deliberately, much like my dear and (kinda bitchy) aunties and uncles, a.k.a the most diplomatic thing i have ever done! bravo!

so apart from feeling as if my muscles were atrophying, i had no choice but to take useless medicine given by certain unbothered and apparently very hungry doctors, which doped me up so much that my over-zealousness for studying went right out of my dusty windows, and was replaced by a certain manic desire to self-destruct.. muhaha. But, fortunately that was not to be. just popped a few painkillers, and happily went on doing my work and then slept.. and oh...! what a wonderful experience it was to wake up with just a mild soreness as opposed to a crippling pain which made me develop an insane desire for my momma to be with me... aww shucks.. but seriously, mum's make everything better.. sometimes.. heh heh.. don't want to give too much credit do we? muhaha

so yes, under the influence of these kick-ass painkillers, i did another essay and handed it in today. that was the last one! sigh... i feel kinda lost now. i have no pressing deadlines, which means, my final examination preparation starts today. but first, i had to stop this slovenly spiral i've been on in the past few days.. so i did my laundry, got my hair cut, had a long and very satisfying shower and slept with the music full-blast... ahh... and oh yes.. i shaved... im very much an anal person, so these things for me are very therapeutic but obviously, i would have been much more satisfied if i had the energy and willpower to clean my room and to cut my nails..but for right now.. im feeling pretty good... although, health wise, i'm still one sickly child. the painkillers are a great façade... but i'm so grateful to them.. lurrrrrve them... my bebe's.. sweet little capsules of utter delight...

oh yes, exam preparation sucks.. haven't done a thing for today.. but strangely feel soo good about that.. let me put an end to this post right now.. it seems a bit too academic to me, can only imagine what it must be like for the good persons who stumble across my humble weblog...

but u gotta understand, it is purely a reflection of the state of things in my life.. ahh.. the concept of privacy is gone, because i try to hold back.. but the words just flow.. i tell people too much, which strangely, has made me feel good all this time because its a form of release. but only lately has it left me feeling kinda cold, kinda exposed but there's a time and a place to discuss this, and now isn't one of them..

signing off.. cheers!